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Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Human Centipede Revisited

Still waiting for my conception of the Human Centipede sequel to be optioned. I posted this drawing to Tom Six's Facebook page, but no response yet!

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

MacGyver Lives

On one of my TVs, I'm now getting every local channel but one with this halved pop can scotch taped to a balun. It works better than most commercial antennae. I've completed several homemade antenna rigs now—mostly the 8-ear coat-hanger variety—and none work much better than this piece of crap.

P.S. Fuck you, Channel 10

Saturday, December 18, 2010

Mandatory Holiday Treat

March of the Wooden Soldiers is a great example of the type of low-rent visual imagination lost in the age of CGI. If you don't get your mind right and watch this whole movie, at least watch this highlight for the surreal mental upheaval it guarantees. It's one of the only things on film that makes me laugh no matter how many times I see it.

Thank you, odd mormonesque girl named Lisa from Hobby Lobby who first turned me on to this so long ago.

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Infant Godling

This. THIS. The one brutal eventuality.

He takes all that you hold dear.

He configures the Abacus of Pain.

He gives birth to the Omega Disjunction.

He reads the Maps of Entropy.

He dines upon the Lease Agreement.

He incubates the Lethal Zygote.

He digests the Kibbles & Bits.

He friends you on Facebook.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Watch Out for Grandpa

The rise of aggressively marketed Big Pharmaceuticals coupled with the advent of Medicare D have led to such disorienting, counterintuitive anecdotes as one I heard lately, of an elderly man who takes Xanax four times daily along with 4-6 doses of oxycontin. The elderly man then generously motors himself around our fool city in search of adventure.

I’m led to believe that this scenario is now commonplace, so I’ve coined a new phrase (I think):

The Medicare D Visionquest Package.

You heard it here first.